Shower Thoughts

Tenacious Taumaranui and other forgotten highway gems

Recently due to some controversy over the town of Taumaranui, I decided to address my opinion on it. Some believe that Taumaranui is God’s gift to the world, yet some view this small settlement as the asshole of the earth.

The few people I’ve met who've hailed from this small place are very interesting characters. This comes as no surprise to anyone. These people endure some of the most extreme conditions known to man, and they conquer this by drinking possibly the world’s worst beverage, Waikato (swamp-water). These people are unique.

Taumaranui sits on the Adventure Highway and starts the Forgotten World Highway in the central King Country of the North Island. While it is questionably included in King Country, it is most definitely a valued member of the Forgotten World Highway, let’s be real, you don’t want to remember this place.

Some people view this small place (and the surrounding area) as a third world country material, and I would tend to agree. Cell phone coverage is nonexistent, and from what I’ve been told, you’d be lucky to get anything over dial-up for the majority of the area. Despite these third-world aspects, Taumaranui has some redeeming aspects. It recently had a $150K plus job going for a manager at a tourism business, and it also has a ‘virtual’ graveyard. An intriguing misallocation of taxpayer dosh.

Speaking of third-world countries, there is another town close to lovely Taumaranui, called Whangamomana (The Republic of Whangamomana). It is also a valued member of the Forgotten World Highway. This small town is recognised as a different country. Whangamomana is complete with presidents, however, not many of them have been human. They even have passports and passport stamps to ensure safe passage through Whangamomana.

Arguably the most influential President of the Republic was “Billy Gumboot the Goat”, who won the election by a landslide. Although some residents speculate he ate the other challengers' ballots in order to win. He died in office after serving for 18 months. I believe other countries could learn a thing or two from Whangamomana, animals as presidents is a bloody good idea. Let it be said that Whangamomana has a phenomenal pub as well.

These are just some examples of the gems you’ll find whilst traveling through the nether region of New Zealand. Time for a road trip.

TL;DR: Don’t let the name fool you. The Forgotten World Highway is a very memorable place.

Until Next Time,

Todd

Not Your Average Ponderer