1. Call anything that’s not new ‘vintage’
2. Randomly appear offline throughout facebook chat convos
3. Take up an alty hobby such as analogue photography, knitting,volunteering at the local art gallery or ultimate frisbee.
4. Buy an iPhone
5. Stop drinking Cody’s. Choose Cindy’s instead.
6. Date someone who buys your friends drinks in town
7. Go op-shopping, or if you refuse to do that, then go to ‘Good as Gold’ and spend $600 on an oversized jersey that reaches your ankles.
8. Don’t give a fuck about nothing.
9. Use big words that you don’t know the meaning to sound intelligent.
10. When you walk into a room, do so in slow motion.